Who I am in God

I have been thinking a lot lately about who I am in God and where I fit in the world around me. I have learned over the last wee while that I can't be to people what someone else is and that has been something I have struggled with over the years. I see how important or valuable someone is in their role as a friend or in their role that God has asked them to do and I have tried to be that person, tried to see what they are doing that makes their way of life so 'good' for want of a better word. I guess its almost grass is always greener kinda attitude but not of material things, of levels of faith, of being needed. I have seen people doing amazing things for God and amazing things in their lives and my thought is not what could I do for God but I want to do that, I want to be that. Not for others admiration but for that feeling of being in the right place doing the right thing.

But it dawned on me lately, when a friend of mine said that she didn't want to get to know me at first as she thought I was to perfect, had it to sorted with God and it wasn't until she knew that I was just as messed up as everyone else that she could relate to me. It hit me! I can't be to people what others are but in the same respect they can't be me. And the importance of that is God just wants me to be me; that's all he is asking. We are most effective for God in the lives of others when we are where God wants us, doing what God wants, when God wants and how God wants. Not when we are trying to be what God wants someone else to do.

If we try to be someone else we leave a gap where we should be, where God intended us to be. The world around would miss out and I would miss out on the blessings that God can bring through the self-fulfilment of the purpose God has for me and only me. God has a purpose for each of us, that's why we are all so unique and if we don't do what God has made us for then and try to be something we are not then are we saying to God sorry but your plan is rubbish and I have a better idea? I need to spend more time reminding myself of who I am and reminding people I know that they too are loved and created just how God needs us.

I guess the key thing is who shapes and moulds my view on who I should be, who do I let influence me. I know too often God's voice is not the loudest in my mind and oh how it should be! Reminds me of Romans 12:2. Transforming of your mind, man do I need that sometimes! God in my everything! that includes me. I am a miracle.

A study I once heard on John Ch4 once kept stating 'to be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known' God knows us inside out, he made us in his image. Would I call God rubbish and stupid? No. So why do I do it to myself when I am made by him in his image! By keeping the God made me suppressed sometimes in order to try and conform, I let part of me die instead of shine. God's beauty is so much greater than any beauty man can imagine so instead of hiding God to let man shine how much more could I be if I trust more, if I let God be through me and in all I do.

I recently tried so hard with a project to be fully reliant on God for everything instead of as usual trying to go alone. God sustained me at every stage, he provided at every stage and wow did he bless at every stage! When you are the right person, doing the right thing for God when God wants you to do it boy do you know about it, it feels so good. It doesn't take away the hard work, the time, any of that stuff but it brings so much more into the equation! Because if we do our job God will sure do his!